Standing at the Edge of Fear

For most of my life, three of my greatest fears were:

1. Heights

2. The ocean

3. Public speaking

Last year, I jumped off a cliff into the ocean in Maui and joined a Toastmasters club.

Not because I’m fearless.

Not because I’m an adrenaline junkie.

But because I was tired—tired of letting fear dictate what I could or couldn’t do.

Fear used to call all the shots…

And I was very good at justifying it.

I told myself that I needed more certainty. More time. More control. More security. More knowledge. A better plan. A guarantee that it would all work out.

I wanted to know I’d succeed before taking the leap.  

I wanted to feel fearless and confident before trying something new and scary.

But we know that’s not how life works. We don’t get certainty up front.

And confidence is not the entry point—it’s often the result of taking action.

Confidence without experience is like reading a manual on how to ride a bike and thinking that’s the same as knowing how to ride a bike.

Sure, it might help you feel prepared, but you only build the actual skill of riding a bike by doing the thing.

Fear doesn’t mean “stop.” It means “pay attention.”

One of the biggest shifts I’ve had to make is realizing that fear isn’t something to get rid of or fix—it’s something to build capacity for.

And the only way to build that capacity is by being with it and moving through it.

We tend to treat fear like it’s a stop sign, but more often, it’s a slow down sign.

A look both ways sign.

A this matters to you sign.

And when we confuse fear for danger, we end up turning back and missing out on so much of life.

If I had let fear win…

I would have never experienced the joy of speaking to a room full of people and watching their eyes light up when something I said moved them or resonated with them.

I would have never felt the thrill and magic of jumping into stunning, crystal-clear water in Maui and swimming alongside sea turtles.

I would have never known the depth of growth, meaning, and impact that comes from being a coach and entrepreneur.

And I would have missed out on the deeply gratifying, heart-expanding sense of fulfillment I feel each time I get to witness a client showing up with more self-compassion, courage and integrity to their life.

Learning to walk with fear

Fear continues to show up often. But now, instead of yelling at me to run, it reminds me to breathe.

And when fear shows up, I now know what’s waiting for me on the other side:

Authentic connection.

Joy.

Freedom.

Creative expression.

Purpose.

I’ve discovered that everything I want truly lives on the other side of fear, and the same is true for you.

I leave you with this.

One day, you’re going to reach the end of your life.

And you’ll look back on the life you lived.

What do you want to be able to say?

That you played it safe?

Or that you did the scary thing because it mattered?

You don’t need to take a giant leap today.

Just lean in—one inch closer. Take one step beyond your comfort zone.

Because the truth is, the greatest risk isn’t failing.

The greatest risk is never finding out what could’ve been possible had we dared to meet our fear.

I promise you—you are far more powerful than fear will ever be.

We are not here to live a small, safe, perfectly predictable life.

We are here to live full out.

Boldly. Courageously. Unabashedly.

So let’s not waste it.

You’ve got this.